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      10-25-2012, 12:08 PM   #1
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So I made a stupid mistake...

So I made a stupid mistake at my new work today. I have 2 supervisors; one of them has a strong-rude personality and a big mouth. Well, I went into his office thinking that he's my friend by now and made a stupid (mistake) joke about how rude he is and that I would like to work with him more. What I didn't expect that he would get very defensive and started twisting my own words against me. He pretty much insulted me, in a formal way, a couple of times. He also thought that I was trying to snitch on my coworkers and getting jealous of them when I asked him why they left early. All I wanted know if I can leave early as well. I was speechless pretty much the whole thing as I didn't expect any this and if I said anything it made it worse. I apologized to him and said that I didn't mean any of this and that's not who I am. But I doubt that my apology did anything to help my case. Now normally, I wouldn't give a fuck if I offended anybody. It was obvious that it was a stupid joke. But since I have to work with the guy and can't avoid him, WTF is the best way to get out of this mess?! I already apologized to him twice. Spare me the CSB, I don't need that now. I can’t believe how stupid I am to make that fucking joke.
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BMW have tapped into this by mirroring typical BMW dynamics and steering communication within the new UKL cars.
You mean massive body roll, a steering system that is not connected to the front wheels, and the engine note played through the speaker system?!?!?!?!

Last edited by Wolf; 10-25-2012 at 01:31 PM.. Reason: wouldn't give a fuck*
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      10-25-2012, 12:11 PM   #2
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you've already apologized, just don't acknowledge any further references to it... and get back to work


Last edited by amanda hor$t; 10-25-2012 at 12:40 PM..
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      10-25-2012, 12:23 PM   #3
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so what was the joke?
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      10-25-2012, 12:38 PM   #4
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Change careers. Just don't be a comedian!


Seriously don't mention it and move on. That's the only thing you can do. And get good work done, whatever it is you do.

EDIT:
Um, I don't know what CSB is, but something tells me I didn't spare you from it in this post. Therefore, if you want to be spared from CSB, don't read the rest of this post, if CSB is what I am assuming CSB actually is.

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Originally Posted by Wolf View Post
Spare me the CSB, I don't need that now.
/EDIT

Learn to read people better in a professional setting. Does he joke with you? If not, I wouldn't joke with him. Especially when the joke is on him!

And I would not ever be asking my boss why someone else left early; that's none of your business. That looks like you're being nosy. If you need to leave early, go to your boss and say "I need to leave early today because [xyz]" - how would asking about why someone else left early possibly give you any reason to leave early? It's not school, it's work, dude!

Last edited by ddk632; 10-25-2012 at 12:51 PM.. Reason: Attempting to spare OP from CSB
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      10-25-2012, 12:45 PM   #5
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1) Don't mention it again. Get back to work. Do a good job.

2) Understand that you and your boss have an asymmetric relationship.

3) Understand that this attitude:
Quote:
Now normally, I would give a fuck if I offended anybody.
Can cause you problems in or out of work.
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      10-25-2012, 12:57 PM   #6
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Just don't make any reference to it, and pretend it never happened. Work hard and don't leave early.
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      10-25-2012, 02:55 PM   #7
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I love threads that start with "So I made a mistake"....it just warms the cockles of my cold little heart.

Well done, and thank you for sharing.

No idea what CSB is and don't care to look. Thus, I will say this - even reading your post makes you come across as a bit of a jerk. Which I'm not saying you are IRL, since I don't know you, but clearly, you need to work on how you present things. Both verbally and in written form.

For example, your comment "All I wanted know if I can leave early as well." No. The answer is no, it is always no, especially when asked with that kind of attitude which strikes me as entitled. You were hired to do a job, do it. Stay as late (or early) as required to do it. What would possess you to think that was an acceptable question? You don't know the people leaving early (I mean you do not know their situations), nor do you know their salaries and whether they've reached some kind of arrangement to leave early. You especially do not ask this when you have only recently started. Wow.

All you can do now is work hard, show him that you are not that type of person, deliver great work and be willing to stay late if needed. Maybe you even volunteer that to make a bit of a statement. Need to show this guy who you are (whoever that is - and maybe it is the self entitled brat that comes through what you said above).

Work isn't fair, life isn't fair, get used to it. Things have a way of coming around in the long term though. I had a boss that disliked me (admittedly, I genuinely screwed up and I knew it so I couldn't fault him for that) - he held a grudge against me for about 2 years. During that time, I got pretty close to quitting some times, but I never let him know - I was nice to him. Now, things have turned around because during that time I just put my head down and did the best I could for him, and he likes me now.
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      10-25-2012, 04:09 PM   #8
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^ you're right. out of college, i had several jobs (mainly consulting oriented), gave me a very quick/diverse experience of office life. i hated it. found a way out. don't have a ton of cash, but it's enough. i'll never go back.
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      10-25-2012, 05:02 PM   #9
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CSB- Cool story bro.
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      10-26-2012, 12:08 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolf View Post
So I made a stupid mistake at my new work today. I have 2 supervisors; one of them has a strong-rude personality and a big mouth. Well, I went into his office thinking that he's my friend by now and made a stupid (mistake) joke about how rude he is and that I would like to work with him more. What I didn't expect that he would get very defensive and started twisting my own words against me. He pretty much insulted me, in a formal way, a couple of times. He also thought that I was trying to snitch on my coworkers and getting jealous of them when I asked him why they left early. All I wanted know if I can leave early as well. I was speechless pretty much the whole thing as I didn't expect any this and if I said anything it made it worse. I apologized to him and said that I didn't mean any of this and that's not who I am. But I doubt that my apology did anything to help my case. Now normally, I wouldn't give a fuck if I offended anybody. It was obvious that it was a stupid joke. But since I have to work with the guy and can't avoid him, WTF is the best way to get out of this mess?! I already apologized to him twice. Spare me the CSB, I don't need that now. I can’t believe how stupid I am to make that fucking joke.
Sounds like you are the one with the strong, rude personality and big mouth.
I don't think ANYBODY likes being told they are rude, much less by a subordinate.
So you were trying to buddy up to him, but what makes you think telling him he's rude is a good way?
Theoretically, you have this false notion of befriending someone by insulting them, which is how you interact with one of your parents.
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      10-26-2012, 01:57 AM   #11
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Kill him, then dispose in a landfill.
Problem solved, no more awkwardness, and ask for his job.
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      10-26-2012, 07:23 AM   #12
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^^

And THAT, folks, is why I frequent the OT. Good, sound advice.

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      10-26-2012, 04:41 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolf View Post
Well, I went into his office thinking that he's my friend by now
if you don't understand when someone is your friend, you may want to take a step back and determine if your life on this planet is even worth it....
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      10-27-2012, 01:25 AM   #14
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LOL So much WIN in these comments.
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      10-28-2012, 10:00 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolf View Post
So I made a stupid mistake at my new work today. I have 2 supervisors; one of them has a strong-rude personality and a big mouth. Well, I went into his office thinking that he's my friend by now and made a stupid (mistake) joke about how rude he is and that I would like to work with him more. What I didn't expect that he would get very defensive and started twisting my own words against me. He pretty much insulted me, in a formal way, a couple of times. He also thought that I was trying to snitch on my coworkers and getting jealous of them when I asked him why they left early. All I wanted know if I can leave early as well. I was speechless pretty much the whole thing as I didn't expect any this and if I said anything it made it worse. I apologized to him and said that I didn't mean any of this and that's not who I am. But I doubt that my apology did anything to help my case. Now normally, I wouldn't give a fuck if I offended anybody. It was obvious that it was a stupid joke. But since I have to work with the guy and can't avoid him, WTF is the best way to get out of this mess?! I already apologized to him twice. Spare me the CSB, I don't need that now. I can’t believe how stupid I am to make that fucking joke.


All is not lost. Since you already apologized, just let it go and focus on your work. No need to bring it up again unless he does. The more time passes, the less likely this will be an issue in the future.

Being a supervisor of 35+ people at my work, one of my biggest pet peeves is when new employees who get too "comfortable" around me too quickly. You have to earn the right to treat me like a buddy, and the best way to do that is to work hard and prove that you're an asset to the team. Asking to leave early and being casual with me when you're a brand new rookie aren't the best ways to prove your worth. Lastly, just because you think your supervisor is rude and has a loud mouth, just remember these letter...R.H.I.P. Rank Has Its Privileges. Unless what he says or does violates company policy or breaks the law, HE'S the boss. If you're not comfortable with that, you can leave.
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      10-28-2012, 10:19 AM   #16
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You already apologized so now just stick to your work and don't mention it again. If by any chance your boss does bring it up again, don't get into a conversation about it. Just leave it alone but listen to what he has to say about it and don't apologize again for it either. Best thing you can really do is simply stick to your work and don't be sour about any of this...shit happening is part of life...you've learned and now move on. Heck, you might even impress him if you stick with a positive attitude and continue to work hard. He's most likely placed others in similar situations (if he's as rude as you say) and they handled it poorly so don't do the same. GL.
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      10-29-2012, 10:51 AM   #17
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TSB..
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      10-29-2012, 12:21 PM   #18
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Quit your job, he obviously hates you now... Then move to another city and don't tell anybody about it so you can start fresh. Brand new life from scratch.
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      10-29-2012, 04:25 PM   #19
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Just forget it and move on. Realize maybe he isn't the type of boss you can be "friends" with. A lot of supervisors are just that, supervisors. Give it time and he'll forget it too, especially if you do a good job at work.
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      10-29-2012, 05:45 PM   #20
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The stupid mistake was not the joke but thinking that your work colleagues are your friends..you should know better than that
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      10-29-2012, 06:20 PM   #21
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No one is your "friend" at work place. People come and go, don't take it too personally. MOVE ON.
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      10-30-2012, 09:38 AM   #22
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Quote:
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No one is your "friend" at work place. People come and go, don't take it too personally. MOVE ON.
strong 4th post....
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